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My wife and I spend an average of 16 hours per week taking our children to various activities-from wrestling to karate to gymnastics, walks along the beach or workouts at the gym. Often, we are there to watch and show support for what they are doing. We do not simply drop the kids off and leave.

Being that my daughter doesn't wrestle or practice martial arts yet, I spend more time with my son than with her-and my wife and I believe this is not only a good thing, but a very important one. And so, while driving my son to and fro, I talk to him about many things. I talk about desire, imagination, goals, having an "I can and I will" attitude. I tell him success stories that were passed on to me by my coaches and teachers. I don't spend as much time with my daughter right now, as I believe my wife knows how to raise a little girl better than I do-and I know how to raise a boy better than she does. Both of us think it's tragic that young boys and girls today get less and less male influence.

We believe one of the reasons so many men aren't manly today is because they had very little training from other men.  Their fathers worked all the time or showed little interest in their lives. Additionally, many of these men never found other father figures in the form of kung-fu, karate or grappling, who taught them how to be physically and mentally tough. There are things a boy can only learn through transmission from his father and from father figures.

Being tough, rugged and individualistic lies at the core of what a father is supposed to be teaching his son. A woman can teach these things, too, but it's a different energy altogether when a man teaches it. Boys need a mixture of both energies-yin and yang. Right now, many boys are getting far more yin than yang, and it throws their entire life out of balance.

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When a boy whines, for example, a father needs to tell him to shut up. When a boy cries, he needs a father who smiles at him and tells him to focus. When a boy gives it everything he has and fails, when his heart is broken, he needs a father who will put his arm around him and tell him he understands. He needs a father who will sit with him and explain that part of life is making mistakes and failing-and those who become great are those who rise above the pain of defeat. He needs a father who will tell him that if he continues to give it his best effort, he will be a success no matter what the scoreboard or scorecard reads.

A mother's influence is huge-and no man can ever give to a child the type of love and affection a devoted mother gives.  It's not possible. The same goes for what a devoted father can give his children. Whether or not he realizes it, his mere presence gives his child an energy that no woman can give.

I realize there are many children in today's world who are growing up without a powerful father's influence. This is where martial arts can play a major role. Whether the masters are male or female, they know what being tough is all about.  And mental toughness is what so many people can use more of today.

One thing I teach my children is that everything boils down to having a burning desire to succeed, backed up by a willingness to enthusiastically practice as long as necessary to get good. Everything comes down to what you're picturing in your mind and how you feel about what you pictured. It's a good idea to have this message delivered to people with both yin and yang energy. First, people need to hear this message, and then they need to see it in action.

Teaching isn't just talking. Teaching is living what you teach.  It's being a model for what you believe in. More men need to wake up and realize how vitally important they are to their children.  More men need to take an active role in helping raise boys who are powerful, sensitive and balanced. We've never had a shortage of women willing to do their part-and then some. It's time for more men to do likewise.